No one can foresee the future. When you fall, the only person who can pick you up is yourself.
I have always loved this saying, not because of its profound philosophy, but because it resonates deeply with my heart. I always believed I could overcome myself, but as time passes without success, I have begun to waver and doubt if I am truly capable.
I often tell my friends that life presents many troubles, and it is impossible to resolve every single one. Therefore, when faced with questions I cannot solve, I prefer to set them aside and let time take its course. This is not an act of escape, but a refusal to spend my entire life stuck on a single issue. In truth, these words are meant more for myself, as the problem that has troubled me for years remains unresolved, leaving me trapped in an emotional vortex.
At every moment, I find myself watching your life from afar. I dare not call, so I rely on friends or social media to keep up with your news. But the more I learn, the more my heart aches, for I know that to you, I am nothing, and perhaps you have even forgotten my confession. Yet, my feelings for you remain unchanged.
But what choice do I have? I long to let go, to step out of this vortex, to let go of you, and finally, to let go of myself.
All my erratic behavior is because of you. For you, I stay awake all night; for you, I hold my phone until it grows warm, repeatedly dialing but never finding the courage to press call. Everything I do is for you. Tell me, am I not unlovable in this way? Do I not deserve scorn?
Even so, I continue to yearn for you. I won't force myself to move on too quickly; as the saying goes, "haste makes waste." I believe time is the best healer, and perhaps one day, I will truly find peace. Although I know that long-distance longing is bitter, I still choose to long for you; although I know the encounters in my dreams are brief, I still choose to dream; although I know missing you is painful, I still choose to miss you forever...
